Translated by Adam Cullen
I’m at home awaiting a god
awaiting at an open window
my own little god
who should be getting home right about now
the rooms are aired out
a simple meal made from not much of anything steams on the table
awaiting us
(it’s the end of the month and my wallet’s
also been effectively aired out)
but I know that
emptiness is often a blessing
and not much is everything
and here my tiny god comes
everything fluttering around him
blissfully and carelessly
coat flaps sneaker laces scarf backpack
unzipped and wide open
he’s dragging a stick across fence posts
and they sing
and only a teensy god
knows how to make such music
he steps inside
and look he’s got an ice-cream cone
garnished with young pine needles
and he says it’s because he knows:
it’s good when something’s not just sweet
but a little tart and bitter, too
and then he speaks to me
about squirrels and jays and robins
and about how he plays a secret game
that I also played
back when I was a tiny god:
if you see a woodpecker
it’ll be a good day
we tell each other the exact same stories
over and over
and never tire of them
mom tell me again
what it felt like to hold the bullfinch in your palm
when it flew against the kitchen window that one time
and was lying on the ground, unconscious
I watch him and I think:
my god has grown
he’s tossed his socks in the corner
and, all on his own, is determinedly tugging
slivers out of his big toe with tweezers
but this god doesn’t like washing his feet yet
I see that at night when he sleeps
scratched feet sticking out from under the blanket
yet that doesn’t stop me
from bowing down and kissing those feet
my god curls his toes for a moment when I do
and then sleeps soundly onward
while I sit in the beauty of that divine movement
for a long
long
long while
Veronika Kivisilla is a poet.